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The below article is from the Wall Street Journal online addition.  I urge all parents & educators to read it in its entirety (it’s not that long, I promise).  I have posted it because I believe it adds fuel to my argument that too much media- from texting to video games to computer games- are negatively affecting on our children.  I love technology, and I want my children to grow up to be capable adults who can use it responsibly a competently.  However, I also believe that too much exposure, coupled with allowing kids to withdraw from naturally creative outlets, stifles development.  Hands on activities that force children to think for themselves, solve problems, communicate with others, and learn to negotiate and solve problems, will serve them better than the instant gratification provided to them my so many areas of media.

 

Printed in The Wall Street Journal, page D1

When art teacher Kandy Dea recently assigned fourth-graders in her Walnut, Iowa, classroom to create a board game to play with a friend, she was shocked by one little boy’s response: He froze.

While his classmates let their imaginations run wild making up colorful characters and fantasy worlds, the little boy said repeatedly, “I can’t think of anything,” Ms. Dea says. Although she reassured him that nothing he did would be judged “wrong,” he tried to copy another student’s game, then asked if he could make a work sheet instead. She finally gave him permission to make flash cards with right-and-wrong answers.

Americans’ scores on a commonly used creativity test fell steadily from 1990 to 2008, especially in the kindergarten through sixth-grade age group, says Kyung Hee Kim, an assistant professor of educational psychology at the College of William and Mary in Williamsburg, Va. The finding is based on a study of 300,000 Americans’ scores from 1966 to 2008 on the Torrance Tests of Creative Thinking, a standardized test that’s considered a benchmark for creative thinking. (Dr. Kim’s results are currently undergoing peer review to determine whether they will be published in a scholarly journal.)

The Torrance tests have been used in the U.S. and abroad for decades and are often used in schools to determine which children are admitted to gifted programs. The test is considered a reliable indicator of divergent thinking—the ability to generate many different, new and appropriate ideas, says James C. Kaufman, an associate professor of psychology at California State University, San Bernadino, and an author on creativity. However, he says it falls short in measuring other dimensions of creativity, such as the ability to put these ideas to work to make new and useful products.

Researchers believe growth in the time kids spend on computers and watching TV, plus a trend in schools toward rote learning and standardized testing, are crowding out the less structured activities that foster creativity. Mark Runco, a professor of creative studies and gifted education at the University of Georgia, says students have as much creative potential as ever, but he would give U.S. elementary, middle and high schools “a ‘D’ at best” on encouraging them. “We’re doing a very poor job, especially before college, with recognizing and supporting creativity,” he says.

Many parents are stepping into the breach by nurturing their kids’ creative skills. They are challenging them to generate new ideas or encouraging them to notice problems in the world around them and research possible solutions. By tolerating “wrong” answers or allowing their children to live in a fantasy world for a while, parents can put off the emphasis on skill-building and achievement, researchers say.

In the past, researchers thought of creativity as the ability to generate lots of new ideas. But in recent years, experts have begun assigning equal importance to learning how to pick the best ideas and solve specific problems, often by working in teams.

Some parents are signing their children up for programs designed to foster creativity. One such program, Destination ImagiNation, Cherry Hill, N.J., is an educational nonprofit that involves nearly 100,000 students in annual competitions. Volunteer coaches guide teams of up to seven kids, grouped by age from kindergarten through college, who work together after school to come up with creative solutions. They’re given projects like designing weight-bearing structures from foil, wood and glue, solving a community problem or, for small children, creating a play about bugs to show how they interact with nature and animals. Similar programs include Odyssey of the Mind, Sewell, N.J., and Future Problem-Solving Program International, Melbourne, Fla.

To nurture creative skills at home, parents can invite children to come up with possible solutions for everyday problems, and listen to their ideas with respect, says Don Treffinger, president of the Center for Creative Learning, a Sarasota, Fla., consulting group. A child who notices that an ailing neighbor is snowed in might shovel her sidewalks, for example. A child who is troubled by photos of Haitian disaster victims might donate allowance money to a relief fund.

Asking open-ended questions and showing interest in answers can help. When Meg Richey sat down a couple of years ago to write a speech about activist Rosa Parks, her opening was a clunker: “Rosa Parks was an important person in American history,” says Meg, now 10. “It was dull.”

But after her father Brett, of Charlottesville, Va., a volunteer coach for several Destination ImagiNation teams, praised her effort, encouraged her to dig deeper and asked open-ended questions about how she might improve it, Meg says, she thought up a new introduction: “Can you imagine being kicked out of your seat just because of the color of your skin?” The speech was a winner at a youth-group competition. Now, Meg says she goes through the same process on her own when she writes. “I ask myself all the questions my dad asked, and it gets the creative juices flowing,” she says.

Parents also need to refrain from judging kids’ ideas, even if they seem crazy or naive. When Linda Rice’s son Jacob, 10, told her last spring that he wanted to make a lot of money writing, publishing and selling a global newspaper and an accompanying website, she listened, then asked a few questions. Who would be the best people to ask first to buy subscriptions, the Plover, Wis., mother and former teacher asked. Drawing on her past experience working with gifted students, Ms. Rice encouraged him to think about what kinds of stories he would include.

Jacob decided to limit his early subscription sales to family members and friends. When he ran out of ideas for stories, Ms. Rice prompted him with questions about what readers might enjoy, and Jacob decided to make up some puzzles. His eight-page newspaper had a successful four-month run with 10 subscribers, earning him $90 before he lost interest, Ms. Rice says.

It is best to avoid paying too much attention to the outcome of kids’ creative efforts, says Dr. Kaufman, the professor. “The more emphasis put on the final product—’It’s so beautiful I’m going to frame it and tell my friends about it,’ ” he says, the greater is “the risk that the kid is going to do pictures for the praise, and not for the enjoyment.” Instead, emphasize effort over results.

When Maureen Dougherty’s three kids were small, she and her husband Brian encouraged them to make up their own lyrics and dances to nursery rhymes, says Ms. Dougherty, of Stephens City, Va. Hearing Mr. Dougherty and the kids laughing one night years ago, Ms. Dougherty opened a door to find them stumbling around with their eyes closed, singing original lyrics to “The Three Blind Mice.”

After inventing spontaneous lyrics for years, their children, now 14, 18 and 20, enjoy public speaking and “can think of things to say right off the cuff,” Ms. Dougherty says.

Raising a creative child can be taxing. Such kids tend to have above-average “spontaneity, boldness, courage, freedom and expressiveness,” Dr. Kim says. So they sometimes behave like little anarchists.

Parents can explain when it is OK to be whimsical, and when they have to toe the line, Dr. Kaufman says. If your child loves to parody lyrics to children’s songs, for example, “you have to let them laugh and giggle,” and then explain that “you shouldn’t do this at school,” he says.

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I have a love/hate relationship with my Pottery Barn catalog.  On one hand, I love sitting on my comfy couch, which is, coincidentally, from Pottery Barn, glass of bubbly in hand, thumbing through the beautiful pictures and exquisitely styled rooms.  I love the dining room tables I am certain were created by some Martha Stewart wanna be.  I ogle the perfectly ironed linens and toothpaste goo-free bathrooms.  I imagine my own couch, sans crayon streaks and juice stains, and feel for a few fleeting moments, that the rooms in my house could actually resemble those on each glossy page if I simply put in the effort.

Then I am smacked back into reality when I arrive at my least favorite part of the catalog, the photo collages.  I detest them.  I really do.  I loathe them because again, for a fraction of a second, I can picture my own rug rats, skipping, hair blowing in a gentle breeze, hand in hand, down the beach.  Right- one of mine would surely push the other into oncoming surf.  Inside I must wrestle with the truth… that no matter how hard I try, and however many photo-op threats I make or cute outfits I buy, my photo collages will never be as disturbingly perfect as the ones in the Pottery Barn catalog.

“What in tarnation does that have to do with Christmas traditions?” you may be wondering.  A lot.  Seriously.

Admit it.  You’ve been there.  You’ve listened to friends (or frenimies) regale you of their long-standing family traditions, complete with floating music, glistening tears of happiness and Norman Rockwell lurking somewhere in the background quietly snapping photos (to be used in Pottery Barn collages, no less) like a seasoned stalker.

Let’s face it.  Christmas, the Big Kahuna of holidays, comes with a mountain of pressure.  I can distinctly remember a friend of mine retelling a story, over bubbly no less, of her mother seething, teeth clenched and with fresh sweat on her brow, that, “dammit, we’re gonna make some memories if it kills us!”  After I doubled over and tumbled from my chair with side-splitting laughter, I sobered up (literally).  Wait, “we may all have a memory or two like that,” I mused to myself.  We’ve all felt the pressure.  We’ve all measured ourselves inferior to what we thought was someone’s picture perfect life, family, vacations, experiences or memories.

No one’s life is perfect.  No family tradition goes off every year without a hitch.  Everyone has some nutty cousin or uncle they’re looking to disown.  Aren’t the hiccups, breakups and crackups what make a memory that much more, well, memorable?  This year I vow to grab my bubbly, plop onto my peanut butter stained couch, remove the toy solider from under my butt cheek and face the Pottery Barn catalog with new confidence.  Perfect Christmas traditions and photo collages aside, my life is mine and I’m proud of it- the good, the bad and the ugly.  I hope you’ll join me, both with a glass of bubbly and with your first New Year’s resolution of 2011.  To live everyday in the present, to love life, pitfalls and highlights, to accept the ones you love, quirks and all, and most importantly, to realize that imperfection is what makes life interesting and worth living.

I raise my glass to you- Merry Christmas!

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to the back of your seat, that is!

We all know that kids are expected to memorize a ton of information from counting by 5s and their times tables to learning the definition of an igneous rock.  My daughter, McKenna Kate, who is in Kindergarten, is at that stage where the kids are learning everything from their phone number to the animals that live on a farm.  Whenever MK is expected to learn something new, I write it out on a large piece of white paper and tape it to the back of my seat.  This way she can memorize and then practice new information while we travel to/from school, violin and piano lessons, or if we’re just on the way to the park.  It’s easy, it’s cheap, and learning new information helps kids feel successful.

Happy memorizing!

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Cherie Peattie

Autism & Christmas

Posted by Cherie Peattie at 8:05pm yesterday
Dear Family and Friends:

I understand that we will be visiting each other for the holidays this year! Sometimes these visits can be very hard for me, but here is some information that might help our visit to be more successful. As you probably know, a hidden disability called autism, or what some people refer to as a Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD), challenges me. Autism/PDD is a neurodevelopment disorder, which makes it hard for me to understand the environment around me. I have barriers in my brain that you can’t see, but which make it difficult for me to adapt to my surroundings.

Christmas is one of the roughest holidays for me. With large crowds and holiday shopping it can be very overwhelming, even a bit scary. When planning a party remember that with my over sensitive hearing and eye sight, Christmas trees and holiday smells can cause me mild to severe pain or discomfort. If the noises are impossible to control a personal stereo with headphones set to a safe level for children may help drown out background noise and ease my discomfort.

Sometimes I may seem rude and abrupt, but it is only that because I have to try so hard to understand people and at the same time, make myself understood. People with autism have different abilities: some may not speak, some write beautiful poetry, others are whizzes in math (Albert Einstein was thought to be autistic), or may have difficulty making friends. We are all different and need various degrees of support.

Sometimes when I am touched unexpectedly, it might feel painful and make me want to run away. I get easily frustrated too. Being with lots of other people is like standing next to a moving freight train and trying to decide how and when to jump aboard. I feel frightened and confused a lot of the time. This is why I need to have things the same as much as possible. Once I learn how things happen, I can get by OK. But if something, anything, changes, then I have to relearn the situation all over again! It is very hard.

When you try to talk to me, I often can’t understand what you say because there is a lot of distraction around. I have to concentrate very hard to hear and understand one thing at a time. You might think I am ignoring you-I am not. Rather, I am hearing everything and not knowing what is most important to respond to.

Holidays are exceptionally hard because there are so many different people, places, and things going on that are out of my ordinary realm. This may be fun and adventurous for most people, but for me, it’s very hard work and can be extremely stressful. I often have to get away from all the commotion to calm down. It would be great if you had a private place set up to where I could retreat.

If I cannot sit at the meal table, do not think I am misbehaving or that my parents have no control over me. Sitting in one place for even five minutes is often impossible for me. I feel so antsy and overwhelmed by all the smells, sounds, and people–I just have to get up and move about. Please don’t hold up your meal for me–go on without me, and my parents will handle the situation the best way they know how.

Eating in general is hard for me. If you understand that autism is a sensory processing disorder, it’s no wonder eating is a problem! Think of all the senses involved with eating. Sight, smell, taste, touch, AND all the complicated mechanics that are involved. Chewing and swallowing is something that a lot of people with autism have trouble with. I am not being picky-I literally cannot eat certain foods as my sensory system and/or oral motor coordination is impaired. Don’t be disappointed if Mom hasn’t dressed me in starch and bows. It’s because she knows how much stiff and frilly clothes can drive me buggy! I have to feel comfortable in my clothes or I will just be miserable. When I go to someone else’s house, I may appear bossy and controlling. In a sense, I am being controlling, because that is how I try to fit into the world around me (which is so hard to figure out!) Things have to be done in a way I am familiar with or else I might get confused and frustrated. It doesn’t mean you have to change the way you are doing things–just please be patient with me, and understanding of how I have to cope. Mom and Dad have no control over how my autism makes me feel inside. People with autism often have little things that they do to help themselves feel more comfortable. The grown ups call it “self regulation,” or “stimming’. I might rock, hum, flick my fingers, or any number of different things. I am not trying to be disruptive or weird. Again, I am doing what I have to do for my brain to adapt to your world. Sometimes I cannot stop myself from talking, singing, or doing an activity I enjoy. The grown-ups call this “perseverating” which is kind-a-like self- regulation or stimming. I do this only because I have found something to occupy myself that makes me feel comfortable. Perseverative behaviors are good to a certain degree because they help me calm down.

Please be respectful to my Mom and Dad if they let me “stim” for a while as they know me best and what helps to calm me. Remember that my Mom and Dad have to watch me much more closely than the average child. This is for my own safety, and preservation of your possessions. It hurts my parents’ feelings to be criticized for being over protective, or condemned for not watching me close enough. They are human and have been given an assignment intended for saints. My parents are good people and need your support.

Holidays are filled with sights, sounds, and smells. The average household is turned into a busy, frantic, festive place. Remember that this may be fun for you, but it’s very hard work for me to conform. If I fall apart or act out in a way that you consider socially inappropriate, please remember that I don’t possess the neurological system that is required to follow some social rules. I am a unique person–an interesting person. I will find my place at this celebration that is comfortable for us all, as long as you’ll try to view the world through my eyes!

*Author, Viki Gayhardt

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“F*** You” from the Music Industry – Dennis Prager – National Review Online.

This article highlights the double standard in society regarding what language is considered offensive, racist, etc. and how the music industry continues to lower the bar for what is truly good music.  It’s well worth the read.

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Tears are falling, hearts are breaking

How we need to hear from God

You’ve been promised, we’ve been waiting

 

Welcome Holy Child

 

Hope that you don’t mind our manger

How I wish we would have known

But long-awaited Holy Stranger

Make  yourself at home

Please make yourself at home

 

Bring your peace into our violence

Bid our hungry souls be filled

Word now breaking Heaven’s silence

 

Welcome to our world

 

Fragile finger sent to heal us

Tender brow prepared for thorn

Tiny heart whose blood will save us

 

Unto us is born

 

So wrap our injured flesh around you

Breathe our air and walk our sod

Rob our sin and make us holy

perfect son of God

 

Welcome to our world

 

I send this out to wish everyone a blessed season as we prepare for Christ’s birth.

May your Christmas season be filled with calm, health, happiness, family, friends

And, of course, Christ.

 

 

 

 

Available on itunes- Chris Rice

 

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Ahh- it’s nice to be back.  I took a bit of a break for the Thanksgiving holiday.  However, after reading yet another CNN ticker about Sarah Palin “firing back” at someone, I felt compelled to “fire off” my own post (pause while I read my notes from the palm of my hand).  I’m sooooooooooooo OVER Sarah Palin.  Really, I am.

I admit it.  I liked Sarah.  I’m a conservative woman.  I would like to see more strong women actively involved in politics.  I like that she didn’t come from the political elite.  I like guns…a lot.  I wear glasses much of the time.  I love Neiman Marcus.  And I can appreciate her “mama grizzly” approach to parenting.  I also liked the speech she gave when McCain announced her as his running mate.  If I had been her advisor, I would have instructed her to zip it immediately following that speech and catch a puddle jumper back to Alaska.

How could you say that, my conservative friends are going to gasp?  Read her lipstick!  She’s rough.  She’s tough.  She’s not afraid of a fight.  Yeah, yeah.  I get it.  But how far is too far?  Today she came out against the crazy guy behind Wikileaks.  He misquoted her.  Do you want a tissue?  Do you want some cheese with the whine?  I am beginning to think the reason she resigned as Governor is because she was too concerned with fighting every stinking battle, no matter how small, that she found her little desk job too boring.  Anyone remember Levi Johnston?  Right- he’s a mere piece of belly button lint in the history of life.  But she took him on like a prize-fighter in the ring.  Really?

Am I the only one who thinks she is always ready to rumble?  Am I the only one who thinks the chip on her shoulder has become a bolder?  Am I the only one who believes that if she thinks she can run this country (stifle the laughter…or tears) she needs to become a bit more concerned with serious issues facing our nation than with gossip and Dancing w/the Stars?  We already have a “celebrity” president.  We have enough fighting in Congress and enough war in the Middle East.  We need calm.  We need class.  We need someone who is willing to rise above the pettiness…who has character, strength and who leads by example.  We don’t need a “mama grizzly” whose myopic view doesn’t allow her to see beyond her own turf.

Get over it Sarah Palin.  The Wikileaks guy is a nut and not worth your time.  Use your influence to do something positive instead of for picking a fight.  Leave your snide remarks at home.  Leave your finger-pointing and sniveling to someone else (Pelosi?).  Focus on learning more and talking less; thinking more and grandstanding less.  I’m over it, Sarah, I really am.  And I gotta tell ya that I’m over you.

I will confess, however, that I still love your funky beehive.

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Straight from Answer Keys:  Teachers’ Lesson Plans for Successful Parenting!

Making a list of objectives prior to your parent/teacher conference will allow you to provide your child with more focused assistance and enlist the teacher’s help where it’s needed most.  She will be able to keep you up to date on what is developmentally appropriate for your child at different ages and stages.  For example, if you have the objective that your child will be able to master Algebra by the end of 5th grade, the teacher can get you back on the reality track by educating you regarding what is developmentally and academically appropriate for a 5th grader (mastering Algebra certainly is not).

Base your objectives on the teacher’s syllabus for the year, the state and/or school standards for a particular grade level, your child’s ability level based on past performance, test scores and observations & any additional assessments.  Most importantly, conference with your child to help him set goals or to discuss reaching goals already set BEFORE you attend your parent/teacher conference.  It is crucial that parents keep students involved in the process and allow them to drive that process as they mature.

Check out Answer Keys for MUCH more on Parent/Teacher Conferences, Fostering Independence, Organizing Paperwork and many other parenting/education topics.  Order today at www.amazon.com.

Happy conferencing!

 

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